Brett Favre, Nintendo 64 Legend, retires.

Brett Favre, Nintendo 64 Legend, retires

I liked Brett Favre. What’s not to like? Who wouldn’t love that good ‘ole boy from the South that could make something out of nothing, illustrated by his sometimes unorthodox shovel passes that were essentially 5-yard ‘hail-mary’ flips to his halfback when everything, except the completion of the pass, went completely wrong. Favre was a consistent sports figure in my life that you could always count on for his rookie-like exuberance, that chinstrap that hadn’t been updated since the 70’s, his awesome, yet seemingly unfair Wrangler commercials as he is shown at the end playing a pickup football game. I also like the shot of him in a huddle drawing up a play. I could just see him in real life saying, “Okay, just run a Z-14 stunt play action 45 curl. On one,” and everybody just nodding. I know you guys have seen the commercial on TV, but I was able to find a copy of a different version of that commercial, which went unaired, in which they pick the teams for this epic two-hand-touch battle. It went something like this:

1st Captain Larry: Umm, I’ll pick….uhh….let’s see……Brett!

Brett: Awesome Larry! Wow, first pick! Don’t worry, with these Wrangler Relaxed Fit Jeans, I’ll be just like one of the guys.

Larry: Well, until you break my hands with a pass. They’re pretty zippy.



Brett: Zippy? Who in the hell uses zippy? I was thinkin’ more like ‘bad-ass’ or ‘legendary’. But zippy?

Larry: Sorry Brett.

2nd Captain Tom: Well since Dan Marino isn’t walking onto this stereotypical farm field, or out of that stereotypical red farm truck, I’m beginning to think these teams are a little unfair.

Larry: Tough titties Tom. Should’ve gotten first pick.

Brett: Easy Zippy, let’s not get into a fight right before the game. I mean, I’m wearing Five Star Denim Jeans from Wrangler on my farm. Because as well all know, everybody who talks diff’rent has a farm, a truck and a few dogs, as this commercial presents.

Tom: If my jeans weren’t Wrangler jeans, the greatest goddamn jeans in all the land, I’d come over there and rip your kidneys out and sell them on the black market!

Narrator: Wrangler…Real. Comfortable. Jeans.


While the commercials were and his toughness were great, my favorite quality about Brett Favre was that he had the guts to get flushed out of the pocket and rocket the ball 70 yards down the field as if you were playing NFL Blitz and you have three seconds left before halftime.


Even if he overthrew the receiver on these plays, he always had that expression after the throw as if to say, “I can throw this ball like a Vortex with whistles on the side. I’ll smile now, but I would have no problem throwing out my arm on the next pass as long as it embarrasses you and every member of your family.”
Among all of his accomplishments and all-time records, I think the most important statistic is that he played in SUB ZERO TEMPERATURES that made any viewer at home say, “Dude, eff that! I would never go out there!” I mean, do you think that Peyton Manning could do that? If you do, check his record in Foxboro. Additionally, I feel as though the consecutive start streak made him the only guy in football who actually earned his paycheck. In a true testament to his stability and longevity, I am remembered of one of the first football video games I ever played as a younglin had Brett Favre on the cover which was NFL Quarterback Club 98 on Nintendo 64. Classic.
There were plenty of highlights in this career. I remember when he played out of his mind on Monday Night Football just days after the death of his dad. I remember when he high-fived that referee after a touchdown pass. I remember that divisional playoff game against the Niners, which was a great game, and is remembered most by TO’s touchdown catch with the announcer going, “OWENS! OWENS!” (This was before he was TO, and was ‘Terrell’ who backed-up the likes Jerry Rice and NFL legend JJ Stokes. No, there is no typo there. Rice was a second tier receiver at best. Don’t kid yourself) And while I could go on an on about how Brett is one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time, and how he is a character that cannot be duplicated (despite all those stupid comparisons that Tony Romo receives compliments of anyone that is on ESPN, which annoys me), I would like to focus on a part of Favre’s career that is consistently overlooked, as is true for most athletes, which is:

The athlete movie cameo.

Out of all things God has created, the athlete cameo is sandwiched in between Tostitos Scoops and the iPod on the list of amazing things this world has seen. And Favre was no exception as he had a cameo of his own in “There’s Something About Mary.” While it didn’t make my Top Three Athlete Cameos of All Time, I feel as though a cameo in any movie is the coolest thing an athlete can do besides get paid millions of dollars to play a game and receive more millions for every time he or she wears a pair of Nike shoes or drinks a Gatorade.
The only exception to athletes being cool in movies is KAZAAM featuring Shaquille O’Neal, which is in a category all his own entitled “Top One List of Athlete Cameos that Changed my Life and the Way I Looked at Cinema in General” I realize that the List name is of more length than the list itself but KAZAAM is just that special. God what a great film.

The Top Three Athlete Cameos of All Time

3: Lance Armstrong in “You, Me, and Dupree.”
This brief cameo made me laugh so hard that I’m pretty sure that I lost a testicle in tribute to Lance himself. (That’s not a cancer rip, but rather a testament to Armstrong’s manliness and my admiration of him.) In case you didn’t see this movie, the basic context is that Matt Dillon is imagining Owen Wilson (Dupree) seducing his new wife (Kate Hudson, who coincidentally is my future wife. awkward.) and Lance Armstrong asking Dupree if he needs any butter for this encounter with Hudson. This alludes to Dupree using butter in an unspecified fashion while seducing a young woman earlier in the film. Brief, but terrific.



2: Lance Armstrong in “Dodgeball”
I got chills when I first saw this scene. And every subsequent time I see it. If you don’t like Lance Armstrong, you will now. If this clip doesn’t do the trick, then you are most likely a Communist. I hate to see it go #2, but that shouldn't take away from this scene. I especially like when he says, "Yeah that's me."




1: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar in “Airplane”
Okay, I don’t expect a whole lot of people in this day in age to have seen this movie. However, it is an amazing film and it just goes to show you how far this country has come in terms of politically-correctedness, whether that is good or bad is your call. Anyways, the basic outline is that Kareem is a co-pilot on this plane. This is definitely a movie you need to see before you die.



Well there you have it. My Top Three Athlete Cameos of All Time. If you have any suggestions or problems with this list, let me know. While I think I did a damn good job, I realize I am a little biased to like myself…and KAZAAM.